Snuggling under the covers with someone you’re really into is pretty great.
But when the spooning and cuddles just aren’t quite intimate enough — but you’re not up for a bed-shaking sex session — it turns out there’s another option: cock warming.
A Reddit thread recently went viral after a woman admitted to enjoying falling asleep with her partner’s penis resting in her mouth.
While it might sound unusual to say the least, cock warming is actually a well-established kink.
As Lovehoney’s sex and relationship expert Annabelle Knight tells Metro, cock warming is ‘a kink where rather than simply cuddling, the penetrating partner enters their partner — vaginally or anally — and remains there without movement.’
One Urban Dictionary post also suggests that the definition should also include the mouth, too, labelling it a ‘more intimate version of spooning.’
What’s cock warming actually about?
As Annabelle explains, cock warming is sometimes confused with other slang terms, including ‘parking it,’ ‘dead-manning,’ or ‘planking.’
All of these typically denote forms of penetration without thrusting — but as Annabelle says, they’re ‘usually framed around the idea of pausing during sex.’ However, cock warming is distinct.
Annabelle says: ‘Cock warming isn’t about intercourse or foreplay, nor is it a temporary pause before sex resumes. Instead, it’s focused on closeness, comfort, and emotional connection.
‘It’s fair to think of it as a more intimate, physical extension of cuddling or spooning.’ We’re blushing.
It might also conjure up images of ‘soaking’ — a way young Mormons simulate sex before marriage without technically breaking the rules.
Although the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS) doctrine says that sex is an important part of bond-building and procreation for a married couple, it’s forbidden for church members who aren’t married.
As such, the practice of soaking involves a man inserting his penis into his partner’s vagina.
Instead of thrusting, he lets his penis ‘soak’ in the vagina. Others may then ‘help’ the couple by ‘jump humping’, which involves shaking or jumping on a bed to create movement and therefore increase the couple’s pleasure.
However, considering it’s more about a specific kink and unrelated to a religious context, cock warming is a different practice.
What’s the appeal of cock warming?
Depending on which way you come at it (or don’t — wink wink, nudge nudge), cock warming can appeal to both partners — and some might see it as an anchor for ’emotional and sensory intimacy.’
For the receiving partner, Annabelle says that it can ‘create a sense of safety,’ as ‘being held in that way can feel reassuring, while the physical closeness can heighten feelings of emotional connection and affection.’
On the penetrating side, the sensation can be ‘soothing and grounding,’ as the ‘physical warmth and softness can provide comfort and a sense of calm, without the usual expectations of performance or climax.’
Annabelle adds: ‘Ultimately, both partners can appreciate the closeness and relaxation it offers. There’s no pressure, no particular goal — just an opportunity to share physical and emotional intimacy in a quiet, connected way.’
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How to try cock warming
It should go without saying, but consent is absolutely fundamental. Annabelle suggests that if you want to try cock warming, first, you should have an open discussion with your partner to ensure you’re both comfortable with it.
If you’re both on the same page, Annabelle says that the best way to try it is in a ‘cosy, relaxed position’ like ‘spooning, lying face-to-face, or with one partner resting on top of the other.’
She says: ‘The key is finding a position that feels natural and restful.’
You might also want to try some gentle lubrication, considering that there’s no thrusting or movement involved with this one. And, once you’re both settled, there are two golden rules: stay still, and relax.
‘Once connected, you simply rest there. The focus isn’t on moving or building towards orgasm, but on sharing warmth and that “held” feeling of being as close as possible,’ Annabelle concludes.
‘Enjoy the connection — some couples use this as a way to fall asleep together, others as a post-sex cuddle, or even just a quiet moment of bonding.’
This article was originally published on December 5, 2025.
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